Part 3 - Simming Your Character

From EF Infobase

Contents 1 Simming Your Character 1.1 REQUIREMENTS AND ETIQUETTE 1.2 SIMMING DIFFERENT ROLES 1.3 ON WRITING 2 FURTHER READING:

Simming Your Character

REQUIREMENTS AND ETIQUETTE

Format and Posting

In section 1.2, "What We Do", we briefly laid out the broad strokes of what simming is and what a player does. Here we're going to go into a little bit more depth on the subject. As we already mentioned, as a player you will participate in the game by posting something called '"fics".

Fics (also known as "Posts" or "Logs") are little story snapshots, moments in time that move your character along from one moment to the next. They're not independent stories, they're more like scenes in a screenplay. (For independent short stories, posting in the "fiction" forum is highly encouraged. See the “On Writing” section below for more on this.) They are written in the third person, past tense prose format and posted in the mission threads at the EF forums. (Posting in any other format, such as script format or with little symbols like “=/\=” thrown in as in some simms is not allowed.)

Often fics begin with the location and time in brackets to set the scene. This is to avoid any confusion as to the time and place. There's no formal rules for how to begin your post. Just make sure that the other simmers know where you are and when things are happening. The date is the same as in real life unless stated otherwise, the only change would be the year.

The current year is 2258.

Often stardates will be used. The current stardate is always displayed at the top of the HQ page in the right hand corner, where you would log in to your user account. Take a look at the stardates article for information on how to calculate a stardate for any day of the year.

Now let's say you want to say something out of character at the beginning or end of your post like "Hey guys, what the hell do I do now?", you prefix it with "OFF" or "OOC" (standing for "out of character"). That way people won't think it's your character who is asking what the hell he does now. The “TAG” bracket is used as a passing of the baton, i.e., if someone is expected to pick up where someone left off. For instance let's say a post ends with the captain ordering Ensign Johnson to dance on one foot and sing “God Save the Queen”, the captain might then end the post with something like “TAG: Ensign Johnson, let's hear it!”

The length of your fics could vary anywhere from 300 words to over a thousand. A standard short story is around seven thousand words, so that would be pushing it. You might want to break things up into several posts at that point. Action oriented posts will probably be at the lower end of that since things are happening fast and you want to give everyone else a change to jump in. Character oriented fics, especially introductory fics, will probably be on the higher end since they involve a lot of set up and background information. It's expected you will post regularly, and a good routine could be a minimum of at least once a week or every two weeks. Different simms will have different requirements. Try to avoid the standard "aye, aye sir!" post, where all you do is quote what someone else has said to you, adding "aye, aye!". Speaking of which, that brings us to the topic of length and quality versus quantity.

It's important to point out that we prefer longer and more well thought out posts than a lot of sim groups. Many groups out there do what we call "twitter simming" where a player will post a few sentences, then someone else will instantly come back with a reply of a few sentences, no one actually taking their time on the style or construction of their writing. Many come here expecting this instant gratification and are disappointed when they see longer posts written less frequently. They're shocked that there isn't a new post every day. "Twitter simmers" tend to be more interested in the "role playing" and "pretending" aspect of simming, wanting it to move as fast as a table-top game, whereas we in EF are more interested in the writing aspect. We always will prefer quality over quantity.

Joint Posts

You may have noticed at the EF forums a specific sub-forum for joint posts. These are posts that are written by two players, often involving a back and forth of posts between the two over a period of days. When finished, the resulting thread is then cleaned up, copied and pasted into the mission thread. What are joint posts used for? Well, because it's considered a faux pas to put words in another character's mouth, joint posts are used for any interaction between two characters written by different players. One example would be the meeting between a CO and a new crew member or a check-up with the ship's surgeon.

In the opinion of this writer, interactions are best when they're hashed out before hand between the players, via private messaging or real time chat, where the two figure out what they want to accomplish. For instance one set up for a joint post is two random characters just bumping into each other. Here's an example where person A (a male human helm officer) bumps into person B (A female Andorian engineer). If the two players just make it up as they go along (as is most often the case with JP's) then it will go something like this:

The helm officer was rounding the corner in the galley when he noticed he had forgotten to put mustard on his sandwich. As he went back to the condiments table he saw the last bit of mustard was being squeezed out onto a plate of blue gunk by a tall Andorian female, who wore the engineering insignia.

"Excuse me, but I was going to put mustard on my sandwich." Person A protested.

"Oh, were you?” Person B replied. “I was just coming from engineering, I'm an engineer and I have to be getting back for my evaluation. I'm sure you can get some yeoman to refill the mustard but I don't have time."

"You work in engineering? What's your name? Mine is Ensign Andrews. I work in the helm department, which is very similar to the engineering department in a variety of respects. But you can't have my mustard."

"My name is Lieutenant Brahn. I don't want to get in a discussion with you about mustard. I have to be going. You can have the rest of the mustard if you want." The Andorian set the bottle down.

"Okay,” Concluded Person A. “Well I will be seeing you around the ship and I'm sure we will bump into each other again."

They shook hands, and parted ways.

Still awake? This is pretty thin gruel and not very interesting to read. In fact, it's stilted, awkward, predictable, uneventful and overly formal as both players try to say what they want without stepping on the other person's toes. But what if the two players agreed before they started writing this that they wanted to set up a situation where their characters would start to become rivals of a sort, not exactly liking one another at first. They decide they want to have it end badly to set up their future conflict. It might have gone something like this:

The helm officer was rounding the corner in the galley when he noticed he had forgotten to put mustard on his sandwich. As he went back to the condiments table he saw the last bit of mustard was being squeezed out onto a plate of blue gunk by a tall Andorian female, who wore the engineering insignia.

"Hey, hands off my mustard!" Person A shouted at the Andorian engineer.

The female eyed the clock on the wall and then continued shaking the bottle, ignoring the ensign.

Person A moved in closer. "Did you hear what I said? You can't take all the mustard."

The Andorian continued on, sighing and looking more and more perturbed. At last she tried to walk away from the ensign but he stepped in front of her, blocking her exit.

"Who do you think you are?" He became angry.

With that, the Andorian stopped, looked up, aimed the bottle and squirted right in the helm officer's eye.

"I'm Lieutenant Brahn, Ensign Andrews. And you just made me late for my evaluation."

Not exactly Shakespeare to be sure, but it's fun, it's surprising, it's quicker to the point and it's far more interesting to read. A little planning can go a long way. So if you are going to do a joint post, talk to the other player, maybe trade a few lines of dialog, and see where you can go with it.

No-Nos

If you follow the credo “Be original, but be respectful.” then everything else will follow.

As has already been mentioned, it's not kosher to put words in other people's mouths. It's also not cool to throw in a major plot twist (For instance, say you make a post revealing that the klingons everyone has been doing battle with turn out to be time traveling Cardassian terrorists in disguise...) without checking with the GM first. That's not being respectful.

As for being original, it's obviously expected that anything you write will be your original creation and not pasted or stolen from elsewhere, especially copyrighted work. Overall one guiding rule at EF is that you can't re-use, copy, or manipulate a graphic, article, story, or any creative work without first asking the creator. For example, if someone designed an avatar or signature banner and you want it personalized with your character, check with the artist and ask for them to do it instead of photoshopping it yourself. It may not sound like a big deal, but you'd be surprised at how protective people can be of their creative work. And if for some reason you find yourself in an argument with another player or feel you've been mistreated then go to your GM or a member of The Cadre and let them know. It's better to ask for help than letting a flame war take over the boards. Disagreements are inevitable among passionate fans, shouting matches aren't. Keep your drama in your fiction, and not in the forums. We're not getting paid to be here, it shouldn't feel like work.

For more information, check out the EF Rules page.

SIMMING DIFFERENT ROLES

So, by now you've created your character, (You might have joined up already.) but you at least got a handle on the character you want to play and you're at least passingly familiar with the rules on how to play him or her. Then what? Say you already know that you want to play a security officer, but you might have a little bit of writer's block on how to get started or what to have them doing or how the job might fit in with the mission as a whole.

So here we're going to look at each individual position on a starship and what role they play both within the story and in telling the story.

Simming a Helm Officer

Helm, also called "Flight Control" or Conn are the hands that guide the ship. They share the piloting of the ship with navigation officer. A century ago NAV and CONN were combined into the same station, but as ships became bigger and more complicated, they were split into two. By the 24th century, computer advances will again recombine them with most of the duties going to the helm station, though some of the more technical aspects of flight operations will end up in the new position of Operations Officer.

Since every Star Trek series set on a starship has featured a helmsman, not a great deal of attention need be placed on what exactly a helm officer does. As one can gather, the primary responsibility of the the helmsman is to fly the course that the navigator has plotted. While starships are "fly-by-wire" for the most part (meaning that few flight operations are manually controlled. Most are executed by the computer based on the instructions of the helmsmen.). Often a helmsman is a junior position relegated to an ensign or a cadet and is viewed as being on the command track for those who wish to advance one day to commanding a starship. For this reason, it tends to attract the most ambitious, cocksure, reckless that Starfleet has to offer.

In a simm the helm officer need not only sit on the bridge waiting for the words "engage". Most are also capable shuttle pilots and for that reason can find themselves on landing parties. And remember, any time you're not needed by the plot is an opportunity to develop your character.

Simming a Navigator

A navigation officer is one of the more trickier duty posts to get the hand of, since it was only seen on the Original Series (And even then not much time was spent showing what it was a navigator does). By the 24th century, developments in computer technology allowed for much of the duties of navigator to be automated and co-opted into the Helm station. Other duties previously performed by the navigator would find their way into the department of astrometrics.

What does a navigator do? Simply put, a navigator plots a course, and helm flies it. The NAV and CONN stations represent the most tight knit on the bridge. A navigator and helmsmen are partners and need and need to be in total sync for a ship to fly smoothly. The relationship is not too dissimilar from that of a pilot and RIO in old earth fighter pilots. You might say that the post can be described as halfway between a co-pilot and stellar cartographer. Thus a navigator should know space better than anyone else on the ship. A navigator should be an expert on all things regarding the interstellar 'lay of the land' or 'geography of space', such as: If, for example, there's a nebula in the area that makes good cover for a ship to hide in, or the usual shipping routes that different races use, or short cuts that could cut distance off the ship's travel time if time is of the essence. (Keep all these things in mind while simming. As a navigator you may have to work to make yourself necessary to the plot.) Not much has changed since the days of the high seas, where the navigator was counted as the most valuable crewman aboard the ship. His ability to read a map and know where to catch the trade winds or avoid hazardous waters and keep them on course all determined whether a crew was ultimately going to come home or not. In the 23rd century, the importance of a proficient navigator is no less vital. A poorly thought out course could take the ship to close to a star and tear the ship apart.

One important note to consider: Depending on the size of a ship, some of the duties of navigator may be combined with tactical officer, as seen in the Original Series. One way to explain this is that the same navigational algorithms that lock in a destination are useful for locking in a firing solution on a target. However for clarity and simplicity's sake, in EF simms more often it will be the case that tactical operations are performed by the Chief of Security (As is the case in the 24th century.). If you do not know which is common practice on your ship, ask your CO.

Like Helm, a navigator can often find himself without much to do in a plot. Unless chasing another ship or engaged in battle, most of the time you may find yourself sitting around saying "maintaining standard orbit" a lot. And so it will require some creativity to insert yourself into the story and keep your character in the action. But remember that you don't always have to be at the center of the plot to keep your character occupied. It's not a bad time to use your down time as an opportunity to develop your character, form relationships with other crew members, and give the simm atmosphere.

Simming an Engineer

Depending on the day's work, sometimes an engineering officer can resemble a computer repairman, sometimes an electrician, sometimes an auto mechanic, sometimes a rocket scientist, sometimes an inventor. He's the all-purpose techie aboard a starship whose job is, simply put, to make sure everything keeps working so the entire crew doesn't die. (But no pressure.) If there's one role on the ship that will never find itself without anything to do, it's this one. Before the mission begins, you're busy making sure everything is ship shape, testing and calibrating and making sure all systems are go. During the mission, you'll probably be busy re-routing things, keeping things working or adapting them as needed, or maybe you'll be on the landing party trying to investigate a disaster or recover data off computers. And afterwards, you'll be busy repairing damage. What's the key word here? Yup: busy. Second only to sciences, engineering is the biggest department on the ship. You'll never have to worry about inserting yourself into the plot, although you may have other challenges.

Because like medical officers who are often confined to sickbay, you may get lonely being tucked away in your own separate area of the ship while most of the action happens on the bridge. But unlike medical officers, you can always just head up to the bridge engineering station if you want to be where the fun is.

Simming a Security Officer

The security officer is the subject of one of the longest running gags in trek history, he's the mythical red-shirt with a phaser in his hand. Life can be rough for security officers. The last to know, and the first to die. But cheer up. You see more action than anyone else on the ship. At the end of the day, you'll get the lion's share of the glory. In the 23rd century, depending on the ship, you'll probably end up performing the tasks that a tactical officer would in the 24th century, or an armory officer would in the 22nd. This means unless the navigator has these duties, at times you'll be manning the weapons, targeting hostile ships in battle, raising shields, and trying not to get everybody killed. At other times your job will be that of a bodyguard or a cop, guarding VIPs or breaking up fights. At other times you'll be like a marine, being the first line of defense against an intruder or boarding parties. Still at other times you might have duties more like a character on CSI, investigating crime scenes and making forensic analyses. If you're a man of action, like being the ship's muscle, and don't mind always being the first in harm's way, then this is the job for you. There's a reason why security officers and tactical officer positions are the most popular in RPGs.

Simming a Science Officer

The role of science officer has fallen a little out of favor in 24th century simms since operations officers seem to end up performing much of the bridge duties of a science officer. Thankfully, in the 23rd century, the science officer is still very much center stage. The science officer is one of the most important player roles in giving a simm a 'trek-like atmosphere.' The Chief Science Officer basically interprets all major sensor data, coordinates all the different departments of the science division on board a ship, and is a bit of a one man 'think tank' to offer explanations of new phenomena. He or she will also be expected to brief the senior staff on all scientific matters before a mission begins. While the Chief Science Officer is a jack-of-all traits, more than any other position, your average science officer is expected to specialize in a specific field of study. Your character could be anything from an astrophysics officer to a biologist or xenopaleontologist. Whatever your specialization or rank, during a mission most of your work will be in researching databases, journals, and past mission logs looking for relevant information on the current situation.

One of the unique roles a science officer can have in the progression of the plot (second only to the GM), is to be a kind of 'explainer-in-chief'. And in this capacity, you quickly learn that technobabble can be a bit of an art form. Technobabble done right makes the story more believable and more engrossing. Technobabble done badly is boring, boring, boring. A good science officer uses this opportunity to ground the story in a sense of reality. A bad science officer is either just concerned about making himself look smart or tries too hard by explaining things that are supposed to be a mystery until the GM sees fit to reveal them. Remember, your character won't be an expert on everything and if he is, you'll end up just pissing people off. Another way a good science officer can use "explainer-in-chief" role is in reconciling different observations between players. In cooperative story-telling there will always be some inconsistencies.

Here's an example: Say the ship is under attack by an unknown ship and one crew member gets jumpy and starts describing a Romulan beaming aboard and firing a disruptor. The GM then has to post reminding everyone that no one will see a Romulan face-to-face for 15 more years. One thing a science officer can do here at this point is to step up and with the magic of a tricorder, show that it was actually a Klingon using a Romulan disruptor, easily confused as a Romulan. (Thus keeping continuity straight.) It may sound boring now but if you make a game of it, it can be pretty satisfying. Just remember though, before you do any of this you should always be in tight communication with your GM. Don't do anything he wouldn't want you to do, because contradicting your CO's posts is a major, major no-no.

Simming a Medical Officer

On Doctors

Like the Chief Science Officer, the Chief Medical Officer (perhaps also called ship's surgeon in some cases) can serve an important role outside just "making himself useful and a part of the story". As we've seen, the Science Officer has an important story component in making the world feel more "real" and explaining events and observations. What the Science Officer can do for planets and settings, the Medical Officer can do the same for people. Medical Officers have a unique position in being able to introduce new simmers and help integrate them into the simm.

Case in points: When a new crew member comes on board, they of course need to report to sickbay for their health certification. Here the doctor reviews the crew member's medical history and examines him. It's also where we may first get a glimpse of the crew member's background and personality (at least those who don't have time to read every new player's BIO). "How did you get that scar?" The doctor may ask while examining the new officer, and we discover that the character was a survivor of a klingon attack years ago that left many dead, and he's still haunted by it. Or "I see your blood pressure's high. Stressed out?", and we discover that this new character is a workaholic or worse. You get the idea. In 24th century simms, this is a role often filled by counselors, but since 23rd century men don't need therapy as much as they need a stiff drink, the Medical Officers can fill these shoes. Sometimes CO's want to meet with new crew members and do this, but if not, this is your opportunity to shine.

We saw how this can work in the original pilot, "The Cage", where you see the Captain confiding in the doctor about some of his demons, about his uncertainties and insecurities. Now of course this was mainly because the Captain had a friendship with the doctor, something that is very common both in naval fiction and in Trek, but the same idea holds with any crew member.

Apart from these examinations, the medical officer might be off on his own a lot of the time. He or she has the same curse as the Chief Engineer, being away from the bridge and that means often away from the action. When you're not otherwise occupied, it's a good idea to head out of sickbay as much as possible if you want to interact with the crew. This won't be much of a problem though, since whenever there's action that means people get hurt, and when people get hurt they need a doctor. Also medical officers are always required on landing and boarding parties. And in those cases, the medical officer will also be crucial to telling the rest of the simm about the alien life forms they're encountering. Although this is a tricky area that may overlap with the science officer, so try to be careful. When in doubt, focus your medical attention on humans and humanoids and leave the more exotic stuff to the scientists. Remember, your primary job is as a caregiver, not a theorist.

On Nurses

When you play a nurse you are not really a major character in the role of the medical department. You are there to assist with what is needed by the doctors. However sometimes you will be in a position that you have created your character to be the Nurse and you end up having to do the role of the doctor as well.

First keep the two personas separate if you can. It is very hard to play a nurse and also a doctor type with the same character. What I suggest is make your nurse character more into the background at that time until the real Dr can be brought in.

Playing a nurse is not that much like the doctor in that you are basically a background character, which can be a lot of fun to play. One of the first rules when playing this is to try not to have your character jump ahead of the doctor. Remember you are his assistant so you should allow the doctor to lead you at least to a point.

Do not use jargon unless necessary as remember you are writing for enjoyment this is not. For example...

The Nurse looked at the doctor “I see a torn meniscus that should take only a few moments to repair with the Miocongular machine.”

This is too technical which we shouldn’t really need. Not everyone knows what the Meniscus is. It would be easier to say “He has torn cartilage which can be healed very quickly”

See the difference? We are trying to ensure that everyone can understand the basics of what you are doing. While it is great to be able to put some of the normal jargon into this that still doesn’t mean you should always use it.

Simming a Comm Officer

A communications officer is part switchboard operator, part linguist, part cryptographer, part broadcast engineer. Far more than a 'glorified receptionist' that they're sometimes thought of, they are nothing less than a ship's voice. Besides Uhura and Hoshi Sato, another example outside the ST universe of the kind of skill set and personality you'll find in a communications officer can be seen in the movie Contact. Ellie had to have mastery over a wide array of fields. Likewise, a comm officer should have a knowledge of Starfleet frequency bands and protocols and enough technical know-how to tune-up and adjust their own equipment on the fly. They should have a working knowledge of cryptography since often many messages they will send and receive may be encrypted. And while they don't have to be Noam Chomsky, the characters should at least have a working knowledge of linguistics and perhaps fluency in a few of the main languages of the quadrant since the universal translator is never a substitute for the real thing.

In story a communications officer won't always be as in demand as other crew members. It can be frustrating, as Nichel Nicholls made clear when she once remarked on the set "If I have to open these damned hailing frequencies one more time...". Besides standard ship to ship communications, a comm officer could find themselves: Decoding messages, serving as an interpretor for a diplomatic meeting with a new race, trying to break through interference to reach a landing party, triangulating incoming transmissions to locate the sender, listening for patterns in EM noise to uncover a hidden ship, transmitting ship logs and keeping starfleet command up to date on status. It's not as sexy as being a rifle-toting red-shirt or flyboy helm officer, but no ship could function without one.

Other Possibilities

Remember that most ships have hundreds of crew members, and stations can have populations of thousands. There are more possible roles than could be listed here so if you don't see anything listed above that strikes your fancy, then come up with something yourself. Some of the many unlisted tasks on a ship are: Chief of the Boat, Quartermaster, Logistics Officer, Morale Officer, Chef, Computer Officer, Mission Specialist, Damage Control Chief, Officer's Club Bartender, Boatswain, Starfleet Intelligence Officer, scientists of every field and specialization, and even more choices in the unlisted ranks. Use your imagination. If you have an idea for a position that you don't see listed, ask the simm GM. One of the surest ways to find a job you like is to create one.

ON WRITING

Okay by now you've figured out what the heck the whole Nu-Trek thing is all about, maybe you've created a character and joined a sim. And you know the basic mechanics of what a post is and how to do it. The only question remains, is how to do it *well*.

First, the very basics. If you don't know the fundamental elements of english grammar or spelling, then this tutorial won't be of any help to you and EF probably isn't for you. That's not to say we're full of grammar nazis, but we do prefer our writing to be comprehensible. In the age of the spell-checker, there no reason to subject fellow players to incoherently spelled gibberish. That means anything that's underlined in red as you type it at the EF forums should not end up being posted. This is not to sound harsh, or snobby, but writing without following the simple rules of english grammar says to people that you don't care. No one's pretending this is brilliant literature, (Historically, Trek simming hasn't exactly been a medium of Thomas Pynchons and Umberto Eccos.), but that doesn't mean it has to be absolute crap either. So correct spelling and grammar are a simple courtesy.

Alright, with that out of the way, let's assume you're sitting down and beginning a post. There are two things you should know before typing a word. 1) What the purpose of the scene is. and 2) What your character wants. The problem with the "Aye, aye sir!" post mentioned above isn't that it's short, but that it's largely pointless. You can't figure out what the character's motivation is or why this adds to the storyline. Here's a question to ask before posting anything: If this were a movie, could this scene be left on the cutting room floor and no one would miss it? Kurt Vonnegut, in his rules on short story writing said "Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel that time was wasted." He also said that every sentence needs to do one of two things, either to advance the action or to reveal character. Now you may not always be in a place where you can advance the action. But if that's the case, then you could use it as an opportunity to establish your character. How is she reacting to the situation? What is he hoping or fearing beyond the "Gosh, I hope we get out of this alive!" stuff?

So when you're ready to start, take a little time with the first sentence. Pretty much every opening line that's ever grabbed a reader is through what Chuck Palahniuk called "establishing your authority". It's the subconscious message that makes a reader "trust" everything that comes next. This can be done by quoting a fact, by hooking the reader by jumping into believable action, or by making a "definitive statement". It's been said that no one can say why "These are the times which try men's souls." is better than just saying "Times like these try men's souls.", but if you look at each sentence, the first feels more "definitive". It's speaking with authority.

And make certain when writing to always show instead of telling. Now, this is an oft repeated line about writing, almost to the point of being a cliche, but it has the virtue of being true. Let's say your character is in a bad mood and is being short with someone. It's not uncommon seeing someone write this as something like:

"Hurry up, cadet!" said Commander Johnson, who was having a bad day and just wanted to get some work done.

Is there a better way to say this without just...well, saying it? Like say for instance:

"Hurry up, cadet!" said Commander Johnson after he spilled coffee on himself. He was going on two hours of sleep and adrenaline. Three new systems had gone offline and he hadn't even begun to get through his maintenance reports for the week. And now he had this cadet to deal with. This day just kept getting better and better, he thought.

What's the difference between the two? In the first example, we were telling the reader he was having a bad day. In the second, we were showing him. Showing pulls you in, telling keeps you at arms length. But be fine not spelling everything out. To go back to Kurt Vonnegut yet again, he believed that all classic literature has a certain degree of ambiguity. (Case in point, our excellent fiction series Letters from a Sundered People.) When the reader is listening to something being explained, he's passive and his attention is less focused. He's not as interested. On the other hand, when the reader is trying to explain something himself, he becomes involved. He becomes a participant in the story and not just an observer.

Your sim posts really are serial fiction. And like all serial fiction (whether it's comic books, old matinee serials, even soap operas...) it should end with the audience wanting more but not feeling cheated. If your post doesn't end priming the audience for what's to come next, then it's incomplete. There is no "the end" in simming. Just "to be continued".

Some other recommendations:

• Avoid just stealing the plot lines or dialog from your favorite Trek episodes, unless you're trying to be ironic or making a commentary on it. People have the original versions to enjoy, they don't need you as a middleman filtering and regurgitating it.

• Quality vs. Quantity: As we've mentioned above, quality wins every time. Sometimes enthusiasm trumps prudence, and you'll have a simmer who wants to join a half a dozen sims, cranking out two or more posts a day with little thought to the actual readability or merit of any of it. For some it becomes a competition, people seek to raise their profile or status in the group by just overwhelming people with material. In the end, everything they write is forgettable and all their work goes unnoticed. These people ultimately lose interest and eventually drift away. Then on the other side of the spectrum you have the simmer who posts maybe once a week, his posts are sometimes longer than usual, but they stick with you. You re-read their posts wondering what it was that caught your attention. These people get PMs saying "God, that was really good stuff." They get awards. They get promoted and they are often given their own sims if they want one. There's an unfortunate word for the first type of simmer: It's called a hack. There's a better word for the second: It's called a writer.

And in case I've sounded too much like a wet blanket in this guide, let me end with the Aristophanic Oath of Writing: First, entertain. And that means if you entertain yourself, it'll be easier to entertain others. If you're giggling to yourself as you're typing thinking "Wait til they see this..." then you might be on the right track. Surprise yourself and you will surprise others. Don't plan everything out. Experiment. Throw whole stories out and start again every once in a while. Try new things. Have fun.

FURTHER READING:

• If you now feel that you're ready to join, head on over to the simulations page and see which game is right for you.
• When you're ready to start simming, make sure you're using the correct terms. Check out the EF Glossary so you don't accidentally call a landing party an away team or a data slate/clipboard a PADD.
• Finally, as mentioned earlier, don't forget to take a look at the EF Rules governing players.